


Itsy Bitsy

by inusagi



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Arachnophobia, BAMF Ianto, Friendship, Gen, Spiders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-23
Updated: 2013-07-23
Packaged: 2017-12-21 02:36:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/894802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inusagi/pseuds/inusagi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Toshiko’s scream echoed throughout the Hub. Day 16 of the TW-July one shot challenge. Oneshot. Complete.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Itsy Bitsy

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood.

Toshiko’s scream echoed throughout the Hub, followed quickly by the muffled _tap tap_ of trainers on concrete.

Owen, who was nearby in the Autopsy Bay, got to her first, crouching down to check her over.

“What? What is it? Are you alright?” He sounded more frightened and concerned than she’d ever heard him.

She raised a quaking finger from where she cowered, pointing to her computer monitor. Owen’s eyes were frantic until he realized what she was pointing at, then he laughed.

Loudly.

“Oh, are you kidding me? All the fucked up stuff we see every day and _that’s_ what’s got you playin’ banshee?”

Gwen came next, though Tosh couldn’t tell if she was drawn to her scream or Owen’s laughter.

“What’s going on here?”

Of  course, Owen couldn’t resist being a prick. “Tosh here is just afraid of the itsy bitsy spider. Looks like alls it takes to get her into the foetal position is eight hairy legs!”

He wiggled his fingers over her back and laughed hysterically when she screamed again.

“Please, just kill it.”

“He’s just a little thing,” Gwen _tsk_ ed. “He’s probably more afraid of you than you are of him.”

“It’s huge and it’s bloodthirsty!” She knew her voice had gotten _schreech_ y, but she didn’t care. “ _Kill_ it!”

Owen, the tosser, was still laughing. Gwen rolled her eyes. “Come on, now, don’t be silly. You deal with way worse things every day. Remember that ribbon bird thing from last week? You got eighteen stitches and still gave it a cuddle afterwards.”

Tosh glared.

“We’ll just move him, yeah? Maybe he’ll like the greenhouse,” the brunette continued. Tosh wanted to slap the condescension from her voice.

“It’ll just come back!”

“What will?” Ianto stepped into the area, finally up from god-knows-where in the archives. He looked from where Tosh where sat terrified on the floor to Owen and Gwen’s amused faces.

“Tosh is just being a bit sensitive about a teeny little spider, nothing major,” Gwen answered. “I’m moving him to the greenhouse.”

Tosh gave a fearful squeak. She just knew that horrible creature was going to plot until it found a way back with a legion of it’s little arachnid friends.

“I’ll take care of it,” Ianto was saying to Gwen. “Where is it?”

The former PC gave smiled sweetly at him. “Oh, you are a dear, Ianto. He’s scurrying about on Tosh’s desk. I was thinking he’d like that little purple plant in the corner...”

The technician shuttered. She watered those plants, even if they were supposed to be Owen’s. There was no way she’d be able to keep doing that, knowing that little horror was in there.

Lurking.

Gwen was still nattering on as Ianto stepped towards the desk in question. He looked it over, brow furrowed, until he finally found it on a stack of reports.

Without a word, he leaned down to slide off one of his always-shiny shoes and brought the heel down onto the wiggling spider.

Just as calmly, he pulled a kerchief from his breast pocket and wiped the fuzzy and gooey remains and returned the shoe to his foot.

Toshiko launched herself at her hero, wrapping him in a massive hug before he’d managed to completely right himself again. He stiffened for a moment and waved his arms a bit until he was sure he wasn’t going to fall, but then gave her an affectionate squeeze.

He turned his gaze to their co-workers.

Owen was clearly trying to think of a snide remark and Gwen looked to be working herself into a strop over the dead spider.

“Grow up, you two,” he said.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I know, there’s no real substance to this. It’s just being silly. The word was “spiders.” And yes, I am convince that spiders plot against us. They’re evil and should be eradicated. I don’t care what kind of ecological benefit we reap from them. Death to spiders.


End file.
